Online Business Relationships

“Business Relationships” used to sound like an oxymoron- there was business, and then there were relationships, friendships, you had outside of the business or work world.  Companies classically (and probably still do in many places) discourage workplace romantic relationships, as possibly undermining productivity and morale.  Let’s face it- when you get all “mushy and emotional” in business, your steely eyed judgment and practical decision-making can get clouded.  This leads to the whole premise of Dan Ariely’s book,  Predictably Irrational- the fact that we don;t always make the right decision, but frequently the wrong one, based on our emotional appartus swaying our judgement away from the facts.

But now, business relationships have become the currency of the day.  We want to get back to the time where we dealt with people, not just machines.  We want to know people, have a face and a feeling about a business or brand.  The cold, hard, calculated monolith of business is being infiltrated by the social scientists, who are convincing us that it’s okay to have both business and emotions in the same place and still succeed.

The problem with this over the old Ayn Rand/Mr. Spock way of operating business is that injured feelings heal much more slowly than injured bank accounts.

As a lawyer, I’ve see this all the time.  People get themselves into difficult circumstances because they’ve done things for emotional reasons without weighing all the practical ones as well.  Here are a few examples:

- Divorce is all about rash decisions, either from marrying someone who doesn’t really suit you or share your dreams for the future, or because you decided to go off and deal with your on priorities without a careful balance of what the impact might be on your spouse.

-Trusts & Estates- there’s an old saying- where there’s a will, there’s a relative.  It basically means that people get crazy when someone dies and people have to settle up their affairs.  More and bitter fights have divided families over a deceased loved one’s money and accumulated objects than divorce, I would be willing to bet.

-Family Business- here’s another loaded topic.  Dad has a business, he thinks he is preparing for his son to take over.  Son has no interest whatsoever, and wants to make his own way in the world.  Dad sells business, and son is bitter that his safety net/back-up plan is no longer there for him.  Or Dad gives business to one child and not the other…. you can imagine the discord from here.

And this doesn’t even get into the problems and hurt feelings that ensue when friends go into business together.

Whenever I approach a business relationship with friends, I always want to have the business particulars drawn out in writing.  This tends to seem really formal and silly at the time, but without “ground rules”, people quickly get in over their head.  Even when you have ground rules, the relationships aren’t always perfect, and it’s hard to keep the business and personal from creating toxicity if things go bad.

I was recently involved in a business relationships with good friends whom I trusted completely.  I trusted that because we were friends, they would obviously deal with me in an upfront manner.  I trusted that they would do everything they agreed to do pursuant to our contract.  I also thought they would value the relationship highly, since we were friends as well as colleagues.  I executed everything on my end to the letter, but the same hasn’t always been true on their side of the arrangement.  And what’s worse, the communication has been dreadful.  Despite many attempts to chat with them about it, they haven’t responded promptly, if at all.

The crux of the matter is this:  Because the trust implicit in our personal relationship bled over into the business relationship, I expected them to act more like friends and less like a corporate monolith.  Our business relationship took on corporate monolith -like failure to communicate overtones, which has damaged the trust I had in them both as business partners and as friends.  After all, if you don’t have any information to go on, you start to make stuff up and fill in the blanks yourself.  You might start out with excuses, but excuses quickly wear thin and all that is left is a feeling that they don’t care and you feel you are being treated with contempt, whether that was the intent from their side or not.

Taking a broader scope, this kind of story happens all the time online.  We think we have established a trust and friendship with people we do business with.  The conversation we can have on twitter, social networks, and even by email creates a sense of closeness and expectation that isn’t entirely reality based.  Because these are not people in your immediate daily social circle, there’s no sense of enduring personal obligation like there is with your neighbors or your child’s teacher.  We move ahead in business, thinking we have this incredible bond and relationship, based on how we feel, but in the end, business is business.  When someone disappoints us in an online relationship, the trust evaporates even more quickly than when your neighbor forgets to pick up your mail as promised.  You still have to live with that neighbor- the guy online is more distant, so your ability to rationalize and contextualize your relationship is significantly reduced.

This leads to trust being a very volitile currency on the web.  It can work extremely well, but it needs significant care and feeding to remain healthy.  It’s fragile, and can easily be damaged and lost.  And with the infinite choices available, people will easily find someone else to do business with.  But because the voices of dissent and distrust can always be heard, blog posts, comments and the like about bad relationships will haunt you through the power of Google and the Internet Way Back machine for years.

This means if you are going to play in social networks and social media, the one thing you can never take for granted is how you are building your trust and your relationships, and the ability to maintain those relationships is another currency you need to manage as wisely as the one in your bank account.

What do you think?  Is this true?  How do you build your trust relationship online?

Tags: business, currency, Dan Airely, dan ariely, new media, predictably irrational, trust

The Knack- an Entrepreneur’s Manual

I picked up a book the other day that sounded intriguing- The Knack- How Street-Smart Entrepreneurs Learn to Handle Whatever Comes Up, by Norm Brodsky and Bo Burlingham.  The authors both work for Inc. magazine, and Norm writes their Street Smarts column.  Norm also happens to have degrees in both law and accounting, so I am probably pre-disposed as a fellow member of the bar to take what he has to say seriously (professional courtesy.)

I started reading last night, and I’m having a tough time putting the book down.  It talks about business basics in a very direct, non-professorial way, so that everyone trying to find their way in this roller-coaster economy should find it a good read.  More important, it highlights the things that get new businesses into trouble-  such as not understanding cash flow and margins.  He covers everything from being the boss to how to deal with growth, and this is something so many people need as a touchstone for their own business efforts, whether its on their own or for an employer.

Business confuses people because they get caught up in sales = cash, but never fail to account for the cost incurred in making that sale, or the cost of tying to collect once the sale is made.  A sale is a promise- the difficulty always comes in the execution.  If you make a sale, you have to deliver as required, which is not always as easy as it looked up front- you may have to get supplies from others, or perhaps spend time and money up front for travel and preparation- and that is a cash outlay, up front.  You then depend on the other person executing their promise to pay you right away, but sometimes they don’t write the check for months.  They are waiting on their creditors to pay them, so they can pay you….giving you some perspective on why the credit crunch has a ripple effect across the economy.  If people aren’t paying you, you can’t pay your bills, and without cash, you are out of business.

I’ve written about all of this stuff before, but Norm Brodsky and Bo Burlingham put it all together in one book  that every consultant, entrepreneur, or anyone with any business ideas or illusions should pick up and read before you quit that day job.  If you don’t enter into the business with your eyes wide open and adequately prepared, you may end up out of business, not because your business isn’t viable, but because the cash flow crunch sinks you before you’ve had a chance to swim.

Gotta check this one out right away.

Tags: books, brodsky, burlingham, business, economics, entrepreneur, Inc, new media, social media, the knack

Common Sense isn’t Always Common

I’m interviewing Marcus Buckingham for my podcast, and I got to thinking about a quote from an old book of his that can be best paraphrased as what’s common sense and obvious to you, isn’t always obvious to the next person. Your insights seem like “Well, of course, that’s obvious!” to you, but they aren’t always that “stupid simple” for others.

I decided I’d put down a few of my favorite common sense principals here, just in case they are no obvious to everyone else, and I’d love you to add yours in the comments!

• Everyone defines success differently, and may measure success with a different ruler. Make sure you know what it is to you before you start on that new project/goal. Otherwise, you’ll never know how far you are from the goal.
• Most businesses get into trouble because they are unable to keep up with the growth of their business, or are unable to weather cash flow variances if things get tight or if a client does not pay promptly.
• You always need to build a strong foundation for any business/career/project. This can be time consuming, but it will never “backfire” and you will have something that is more likely to survive changes in the market.
• Paul Newman said “You can do anything, as long as you are prepared to deal with the consequences.” He was 100% right.
• There’s no substitute for honesty, kindness and transparency.
• If you are always true to yourself, you will never be disappointed, even when things don’t work out- because in the end, you’ll be able to look at the risks you took as a learning experience, not a gamble.
• Evaluating risk maybe as simple as saying “If this all went horribly wrong, what would I do? ” or “If this doesn’t work, what’s the next step/plan?” If you have a backup plan, then taking risks can actually be fun- see Paul Newman quote above.
• Connect the dots for other people- it may not be as obvious to them as it is to you.
• Just because you have experience in one field, doesn’t mean you can’t use it in another- you just have to be able to make a case that the experience translates. For example, parenting is managing short, unruly and often illogical employees, with high needs and a necessity for external structure. Sounds like managing a business to me. Add in managing budgets, deadlines, and long term growth (ie saving for college) and you have a resume fit for any business.
• Know all the tools you have at your disposal, and learn how to use each of them well, in many different circumstances. A screwdriver is best used for tightening or loosening screws, but it can be used to open jars, cans, scrape stuff off the bottom of a chair, or even as a hammer in an emergency- but if you know how to use it in all of these ways, you can improvise when necessary.

What are the stupid obvious things to you? What would you add to this?

Tags: basics, capital, cash flow, common sense, honesty, marcus buckingham, new media, ruloes, social media, success, transparency

The Curse of a Little Knowledge

Or, perhaps this should be called- Knowing Just Enough to  Cause You To Waste Time.

We can’t all know it all, especially in new media.  New applications and tools come online just about every day, making keeping up, let alone mastery, nearly impossible for any one person.  So we all need to decide, at some point, to narrow our focus and spend time becoming expert or at least skilled in our favorite tools and maximize how we can get our job done by working more efficiently, not necessarily longer or harder.

I often refer to this problem as “Knowing just enough to get myself in trouble or back myself into a corner.” And this means realizing that I am not getting the results I anticipated, so I need to explore ways to simplify what I do.  For example, I chose my hosting service based on reputation, and the fact that the software allowed me to build my website without taking courses in Dreamweaver, Frontpage, php or CSS.  In fact, when I built my website, I really didn’t know what any of those terms even meant.  However, now that I want to customize things, add features and go beyond the basics, I need to know more about the foundational steps I skipped.  Or, I need to find someone to outsource some of the work to, yet somehow learning along the way so I can still maintain a modicum of control and ability to customize and post things to my site.  I knew enough to get myself to this stage, but I don’t know enough to be able to take it to the next level without outside help.

Admitting What You Don’t Know, Yet Still Being Able to Help Others with What You Do Know

But this involves being able to admit when you are in over your depths, or finding someone willing to do an audit of your work flow to see if they can identify tools that might help you or save you time and aggravation.  This is tough, in and of itself, because if you don’t know there might be an easier and faster way to, for example, collect data, you can’t figure out who to ask for help in the first place.

A prime example of this is a friend of mine who owns a vet practice.  He is on the road seeing patients and clients all the time, but needs to maintain contact with his office.  Calls on the phone interrupt him from his work, and cost him time; his new call phone doesn’t let him access the web or documents quite the way he would like.  After just chatting for a few minutes on the phone, I knew that just by having his staff switch to text messaging him information from the office computer, instead of calling, would save him time right away.  Getting a personal hot spot could allow him to access his documents on his computer right away, and by using Google Docs, the forms could be available to him on the web, on demand, and equally available at the office at the same time.  And all of this technology (except the personal hotspot) would not require any more financial layout.

Likewise, a company I know was getting ready to collect data from a number of customers.  By getting them to use the great new Forms feature on Google Docs, this information would then be conveniently compiled with no extra work whatsoever.  30 minutes of form creation, hours of compiling and aggravation avoided.

The Curse of a Little Knowledge

The curse of a little knowledge is knowing what you need to do, but using old or inefficient tools to do the job, costing you time, money, profits, aggravation and more.  But in order to gain more knowledge, it requires that you can identify your bottle necks, and be willing to ask outsiders for help in the process, in order to raise you game.  And admitting you need help, let alone asking for it, is not always easy.

I want to find a better way not only to let people know what I know, but also to help people know what I need to know!

I think we are rapidly approaching the time in Social/New media where we can no longer know everything- we need to form guilds or pockets of specialists and experts that can help us improve our efforts.  Alex Hillman’s success with coworking at Indy Hall in Philadelphia is one example of this- by creating a co-working space, he has also created a loose association of business and project partners, available at his fingertips.

The difficulty is, of course, merging like-minded people into one physical space, since so many people working in new media full or part time are NOT located in the same geographic area.  Even while we establish strong on-line relationships, the face to face encounters at conferences like Podcamp help build the trust and reputation factors that let any co-working relationship thrive.  Working remotely is convenient, but it does make taking the measure of another person/business partner more difficult.

The one critical thing we all need, if we are willing to open up and admit what we do and do not know, is trust.  And I have found while I can extend relationships online, develop them and deepen them, there is nothing like a face to face meeting to cement the friendship.  Without that handshake and ability to connect, the trust is not as strong.  And if I am going to be totally honest with anyone, I need to know there is a sense of trust and relationship there, in order to open up and show someone what I do well, and not so well,  opening myself up to critique and possible embarrassment at the same time.

So the take home message today is that in order to reach the next level in any aspect of your life, you have to be vulnerable and able to admit what you do and do not know.  In business, or even in personal relationships, you can’t feign knowledge very long, and the trust you gain with being honest is vital.

Welcome to the world of not knowing it all.  It’s actually a great place, with great people and resources.  You just have to be willing to pay the price, which is giving up on being the jack of all trades, but the master of none, and be willing to specialize.

What do you think?

Tags: Alex Hillman, community, connection co-working, guilds, Indy Hall, new media, specialization

The Platform Problem

There are so many things in the geek/online world we call platforms.   Whether it’s Wordpress, Second Life, Twitter, Facebook, or anything else, the point I think we’re trying to get across to non-techies is that each of these “programs” or applications is basically a blank canvas, and what it means to you depends largely on what you decide to do with it. There’s often little guidance as to “proper” or highest use, or any instructions at all, which is fine if you are an internet veteran, but can be pretty intimidating for people just trying out these things for the first time.  The term platform itself is difficult, because it can mean “program” , “community”, “blank canvas”,  “soap box”, “your corner of the web” or a bit of all of these things at the same time.  Explaining this to someone not 100% comfortable with geek speak just leads to more confusion rather than less.

The great thing about the web and the hard thing is that there are no real “rules” in the first place.   So much of day to day life comes with social rules and contracts we’ve learned over a lifetime- from those little polite things like holding a door open for someone coming in behind you, to saying excuse me, to paying your bills on time- all of these transactions require a certain general agreement as to what is acceptable practice and what is not.  Short of terms of service agreements which constrain the most generally offensive stuff, there are no rules to speak of online.

As I try to figure out ways to make Podcamp NYC useful and helpful to teachers, I’ve been trying to figure out how to design the sessions and experience to give the educators in attendance information they can take home and use right away, but the question arises as to whether we really understand the problems in the classroom in the first place.  I am teaching/tutoring in a middle school twice a week, and I recently attended an educational conference that gave me some perspective on how teachers approach problems in the classroom, but I don’t have Master’s in Education, so it’s possible I am missing the whole Pedagogy part of things.

Pedagogy is, by definition, the art and science of teaching.  Yet so many teachers I know have little training in things like developmental psychology or cognitive psychology, so I wonder if they understand the more basic building blocks of how learning develops, changes and works on a “building block” level, even if they understand curriculum and how to structure a syllabus.  So it begs a bigger question to me- how do you teach in a classroom if you don’t understand how information is processed and retained in the brain, or how memory works?

Moreover, if I am trying to design a New Media curriculum for educators, what do they need?  Sure, showing them how to use social bookmarking, RSS readers, internet tools that allow the open exchange and sharing of resources will be helpful.  But isn’t this just handing them a pile of hammers and screwdrivers and say “build something”?  We’re back to the platform problem again-  handing people tools, but not giving them a whole lot of guidance as to how to apply the tools on a day to day basis in the classroom.

One of the things we’re going to start out with at Podcamp NYC, as a result, is asking teachers some of the thorny problems they face in the classroom.  Some of the things they think new media could help with, or things that just cause them frustration.  And maybe, just maybe, we can help brainstorm real solutions to some of these problems together, as a group.   I feel like the people in the new media community have a lot of tools, but we aren’t always good at helping other people apply them.  Teachers are great at identifying problems, but don’t always know that there maybe a solution available.  Hopefully, by talking to each other, sharing solutions that have worked, and giving teachers access to the tools to solve new problems as they arise, we’ll all come away from the experience with a better understanding of each other.

We know the world is changing, and demands that students (and teachers) learn to think in a more hyper-linked, multimedia way.  Adapting to this new way of thinking, that takes “linear”  and “logical” and turns it into a pretzel, is hard for many people, but it’s what’s necessary for the world beyond school.  School and those running them will need to adapt, even as they somehow hope that traditional modes of education will be adequate.

What did you love best about school?  What did you hate most?  If you’re a teacher, what aspects of your job are most rewarding?  What aspects make you turn blue?  How can we start solving these problems?  Let’s talk and explore- let me know what you think!

Tags: classroom, education 2.0, new media, platforms, podcampnyc, problems